Before Julia got sick my life was already changing.  I had two babies close in age, we moved, I was letting go of my photography business, I loved being a stay-at-home mom but was thinking about what I would do next, and my marriage was crumbling. 

I thought about what kind of work I wanted to do and decided to go back to teaching yoga and meditation. I created a Facebook page and a YouTube channel to get the ball rolling.

Suddenly, life came to a full stop.  My best friend’s daughter, who was almost two years old, went into the hospital because she had a stiff neck. They found rare bone cancer in her brain stem.

Julia was diagnosed with clival chordoma cancer and her chances of survival were small. We were all shocked. I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t know what to do. I needed to do something. I took a poem I wrote for my oldest son, that he loved hearing at bedtime, called “I Love You When,” and turned it into a children’s book dedicated to Julia to help raise money for hospital expenses. 

I always knew I would write a book, but I assumed it would be the romance novel that I had been working on for nearly twenty years, not an illustrated children’s book! Julia sprung me off the diving board and into authorship. 

Here’s where things get “spiritual.” 

On Julia’s second birthday, I hosted a healing circle to send her healing energy. I had no idea what to do or how to do it.  I kept receiving messages from “spirit” that gave me instructions and I listened. I gathered a group of people in my home and online and we held hands and crystals and sent her healing at the same time.

One month later, Julia was given a week to live. She was fully paralyzed, in a coma, with no chance of recovery. Hearing that was heartbreaking. Amy (Julia’s mom, who updated Facebook nightly) posted about items in her car. Amy had a box of her dad’s clothes (who passed away from cancer one day before Julia’s diagnosis), an empty cat carrier because Amy’s cat passed away the day before (also from cancer), and Julia’s car seat that she would never come home in. I completely broke down. I was sobbing on the floor with my head in my hands when my youngest son came over to “hug momma.” I couldn’t handle any more. I broke. I’m crying right now just remembering this.

I drove to the hospital; I hadn’t seen my best friend or Julia in months (couldn’t risk her getting a regular cold or flu during flu season) and I just needed to be there. The “spiritual” gets crazier.  During the drive, it was like my spirit reached out to Julia and said “I’m on my way!” Our energy connected immediately and I talked to her. It was crazy and amazing and unbelievable.

Weird ghost things happened to me throughout my life and I knew about energy and healing and I received messages from spirit, but this was advanced. It was different from anything I felt before, it was clear. I was connected to her, I could hear her, I could see her spirit, I could feel her. Currently, I don’t remember what all she said, but I do remember something about her feet. Over the course of the following months, I texted Amy a few times asking her to massage Julia’s feet. I’m not sure why, I just followed the instructions I received.

Connecting with Julia’s spirit in the car was amazing and I’m grateful I was able to drive properly while I talked to her and cried. I arrived at the hospital, went into her room and hopped right up on the bed. I never sent healing like I was about to before. I sent my family and friends energy protections throughout my life but this was different. I’m not sure I was even Reiki level two certified yet. It didn’t matter.

My body and soul knew exactly what to do. I felt it. It was like reaching down into this depth of being, understanding and knowing, it felt ancient. I had no idea how, but I felt everything. So many people had already been praying for Julia and I felt them all. I felt all the love, all the prayers, the hope, and the sadness. Here I go crying again.

I need a minute.

I felt everything. I felt this ancient healer inside of me awaken and I channeled it all, right through my body and into her feet. It was incredible. I don’t have the words to properly describe it.

Julia put up a great fight against cancer. She lived for another year. She held on long enough to be able to receive chemotherapy. She went through chemo and passed with flying colors; they even prepped the house for bringing her home.  Somehow, she had no neurological damage, despite cancer through her brain stem.  She was happy, and sassy with her “O” face and “No, no” finger!

During that time, my life continued to change radically and my business idea went from yoga to healing. I very clearly felt my calling. It was much stronger than a knock at the door, it was the Kool-Aid man busting through the wall. Julia, who pushed me to publish my first book, also helped me find my inner healer.

After chemotherapy ended, the cancer came back, and this time it was all over her spine.  On March 15th 2020, Julia’s body had enough. She passed away peacefully, and the world mourned her loss.

I give Julia the credit for where I am today. I now have three books with my name in or on them, the original children’s book which is still dedicated to Julia and now I donate to the Chordoma Foundation in her memory, a self-help book for beginner empaths, and a book full of authors sharing stories of love. My theme is unconditional love. I have a few more books in the works, articles here and there, plus I get to use my healing energy to help other people heal themselves. I’m grateful.

This three-year-old little girl changed the course of my life. She put me on the path that I’m meant to be on. I’m a published author and healer, thanks to Julia Adams. Thank you for changing my world.